Saying Good, Good Byes

I took this from the internet which I change it to suit my current situation.

“I hugged you like it was nothing at all. In fact, all that I wanted to do is to hold on to you forever. Also, hoped that time will pause and let me breath my heartache. Instead I did what seem logical to my sense: I let you go, smile and walk away. Then I cry at night, because I know that it will never be the same when I wake up tomorrow morning,”

            I never really said good good byes to the people I know. All this while, precious people that I know along my life's journey, I've kept very close contact with them. Nevertheless, here's one of my good good bye & I hope this will be the last one too. I hate good byes. It does not belong in my dictionary.

The way we said good bye: 

            In nature, I like to bush around issues that I do not feel good talking about, so that is what I did. I bushed around to feel better about saying good bye yesterday. I talked about how were my weeks as well as joke around about a lot of things. Deep inside my heart, I was at a state of denial, thinking that this is NOT happening and it will not happen too soon. On the other hand, even if this happens, I assure myself that I’m going to meet you again.

            I can see that you so want to talk about the good bye more than I am. Then it all begins when it was 2.45 PM. You asked me whether I needed explanation on why you are leaving. I did not want to because I’m scared the truth will hurt more then the good bye itself. But deep inside I’m wondering why do you had to leave.

             

           When you gave me that fairy tale book, you made me feel like a small child. A small soldier child, who now needs to travel the journey on her own at the moment. I am not ready to replace you with someone else in the near future.

I will remember the tears in your eyes yesterday and the way you processed your thoughts to write on my gift. In the future, when I think of you, I too will a say a little prayer about you. I had good time knowing you & thank you for being able to journey with me.